Ego

(Kailangan ko na pala talaga mag update ng blog.)

I usually agree to the saying: Time flies. I still do. But today, I recall events that have happened to me in the past four months and I realize how full it has been. Love, or whatever it was that I felt, has made each minute valuable. Waiting for something to happen. Waiting for an answer. And it took time for me to realize that there was nothing for me to wait for. I don't blame my sister or my friends, or myself for that matter, for wanting to wait. Because it did seem like there was much light at the end of the tunnel for me and him. The thought still leaves me with a tinge of sadness. Much has happened to me. Inside.

Not having anyone to think of or to worry about has made me instead, turn to my self. I've started to take a good look at who I am. (Not by my own doing, actually, but because of the acting workshop i have been attending.) What I think of myself, what my needs are, who i value the most...etc. And of all the exercises, the hardest ones for me were those directed for ego reconstruction. That's when I realized how lost I really am. Of course now I want to stop admitting that Im lost, because now Im thinking--I have to do something about it. I realize how immature I am, and at first I felt irritated by it. But now I like it. At least I know where I stand.

I’m gonna miss the workshop… It has taught me so much. Yanny told me the other day how much he thought I had grown in just two to three weeks. And I feel the same. Its amazing how when you look at yourself and you focus on getting to know who you really are and how you feel, you blossom in more ways than one.